Story: Bryan Serinese
Lyrics: Bryan Serinese & Hugo Serinese
Tagline:
Battling a zombie hoard is nothing compared to surviving high school during the apocalypse.
| REPORT CARD: |
| Foraging for food alone in a forest: A+ Building shelter and staying warm: A+ Fighting off a zombie hoard: A+ Surviving high school during the apocalypse: F |
Cast
- Old Duke
- Auggie, SWAG
- CRL
- Stiletto, CC, Courtney Cox Rodriquez, WISP
- Paris
- Matador, MATT, Mathew Perry Rodriquez
- SLIX
- DUDE
- Thornsville Boy
- TRIG
- ELF – Edible Leaf Forager
- BOOM, Boomer
- OWL
- CHP
- Violin Player 1
- Violin Player 2
- Violin Player 3
- Rosen
- Stern
- Warren, CASH
- One Arm Zombie – Colton
- Doc, Jack Duchard, Auggie’s Dad
Act 1 Prologue
Scene opens to a dark forest in the early dawn.
Duke, old man dressed in ragged clothes with a cup dangling from a rope and holding a walking stick, sneaks on stage slowly, looking furtively around. Looks at audience and is startled, then composes himself.
DUKE: Greetings and safe harbor fellow travelers. Hold, hold, do not fear old Duke. I come in peace and mean you no harm. I am whole, nary a scratch nor an ooze. Come feel the meat of me, it is not spoilt. Thin and sinewy, ah, but not spoilt. The smell, you say? My teeth might be of the rot but trust I do not feed on the living. To be honest with you friend, he he, I have not been on the feed for many a night. It was the roast of your dinner that lured me from my hidey spot and into these woods on such a dark and despicable night. No, no threat intended, please, put your pointies down. Ah, you do not seem the type that needs to fear old Duke, look around, look around, I am surely as alone as the day I entered this broken world. Yes, alone I was born, you see my mother was…was…well, that is neither here nor there, a story for another day. You seem a discerning folk, you don’t want to hear a tale as dull as mine. No, not while I possess a story honed so sharp it’ll cut through the boredom I can smell on you even above that stew in yonder pot. How say you we barter, a scoop of that lovely, enticing stew for a tale of these very woods? Oh friends, the story I tell will add the spice your meal craves. It is fragrant with the romance of young lovers, oozes hubris of old kings, epic battles between the forces of light and darkness drips with excess from its grain, all culminating with a singular hope of a sweet, sweet future. Listen here now, a taste to whet your appetite, the year was, um, ah, well, I can’t remember the whens of it all, this hunk on my wrist hasn’t been more than a chain to the past for years. But trust me, I know the wheres of this story, the wheres I know well. It all started just over yonder, see that stump of a once mighty oak, it is that very stump, whose hollowed glory birthed a legend.
Scene 1: Through the forest I have gone.
Lights come up as the sun rises. A zombie wanders across the stage and then another. More and more are shambling until one of them dressed in a business suit loses an arm on a tree, yells and moves on.
Auggie hears the noise and wakes, jumping from his bed behind a log, covered with leaves. Startled, he looks around.
Auggie: (yells) Mommy!?, what the, where…
Zombies turn and see him
Auggie: oh no, not again.
Music starts (fast rock/metal), Auggie grabs his bat and starts fighting the zombies
“The New Normal”
Every day I jump out of bed,
Wipe the dreams out from my head
Do I grab my bat and bash the dead,
Or should I run and hide instead?
Grab a knife, save your life, put the pointy part in its brain
Slash and stab, don’t get nabbed, you need a steady aim
Throw a punch, survive past lunch, forget about that pain
Fight the dead, smash a head, gotta make the blood rain.
Was there ever a time filled with peace?
With no fear of serving as a zombie’s feast?
Ending up a stain of human grease.
To survive I had to become the beast.
Grab a knife, save your life, put the pointy part in its brain
Slash and stab, don’t get nabbed, you need a steady aim
Throw a punch, survive past lunch, forget about that pain
Fight the dead, smash a head, gotta make the blood rain.
Auggie is chased off stage by a zombie. “Thriller” plays, zombies start to do the Thriller dance. Auggie runs back on stage alone, looks puzzled at zombies dancing. They stop dancing and start attacking him again, he fights back. Music starts again.
They say kids would swing a bat to hit a ball
They ran and skipped with no cares at all
I can’t imagine life before the fall,
Gore for breakfast is just normal.
Grab a knife, save your life, put the pointy part in its brain
Slash and stab, don’t get nabbed, you need a steady aim
Throw a punch, survive past lunch, forget about that pain
Fight the dead, smash a head, gotta make the blood rain.
Bodies are piled up around the stage, but one last zombie remains. It is a woman with a necklace. Auggie is about to hit her on the head when he looks at her with recognition. As she comes for him with hands out and mouth chomping, he holds her back with his bat and looks in her eyes
Auggie: mom?
Loud gunshot. Lights go out. Curtain